I am returning from a trip to visit family and do a bit of tourism in Boston. I am glad to be home in California after sleeping in 5 different beds, spending too much money, and experiencing the stress of travel. I am still digesting the trip and wonder what the universe was teaching me about my family, about my life, about my call to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.
I am aware of the strong opinions of others, and how these opinions translate into the lifestyle of these opinionated people. If a particular wrong has been done upon them, it is interesting how some learn from this and move on, and others hold onto the hurt and blame the other for all the wrongs of their lives, how it would have been so much better if the other had not done the harmful act.
Divorce has impacted my family in countless ways, and I find it troubling that events of 12 years ago still have not been resolved, or healed, so the hurt continues. I wonder have I held onto hurt from my life in a way that keeps me from moving forward? Do I still act like a victim? I notice watching basketball there are players who argue with the Ref's about every foul they receive. There are others who accept responsibility and move on. Do I accept my responsibility, without, dwelling indefinitely on it? Or do I wallow in self pity, and feel powerless to change? Or do I take responsibility, pray for guidance and act courageously to change? Thirdly, perhaps is to not accept any responsibility and put the blame on others. I guess I do all three, as I encounter the choices I make, and live by the choices others make as well.
I have witnessed the sadness of when the past has not been healed, so the present is poisoned by bitterness and blame. It all starts with examining my opinions, and making sure I leave room for the Spirit to work in me to change my attitude from blame to acceptance,learning to live in a fractured world.
